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My State of Mind"

In the midst of a serious fight,
I get reminded of this transcient life.
Why do I coddle my ego and pride?
Why do I hesitate to tell, they are my truest delight?
I wanted to come forward. 
To express my love, apologise for my mistakes and let them know how much they are meant!
But, then and there only,
‘Why me’ and ‘why can’t they’ was the question I posed to myself,
And it instantly changed my mind.
To choose between love and pride became a plight.
And this is how I lost the most important battles of my life.
Oh!  I regret, I had time… but… I missed…
 A thousand occasions, I left,
Thinking that a thousand more I will get.
But life is not always the same,
And now I deserve to be blamed.
I wasted years thinking that I am selfish, 
This feeling of regret cannot be replenished.
 I then, made a promise to repent for my mistakes,
To choose love and prevent all sort of heart aches.
I started putting my emotions naked to the people I loved,
And what they did? 
Took advantage of it, made me realise I am not their worth.
Repent, Repent, Repent and Remorse!

© Sadiya Jalal

 

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