Bollywood hasn't seen romance the way 50-year-old Irrfan Khan is forcing us to see this year. There are no grand declarations, no songs promising a lifetime of unconditional love, or unfettered pining involved. His romance instead is simplistic, and carries no pretense of youthfulness. It's a love that's recognisable, and relatable; one that Bollywood has been making us believe doesn't exist in its films.

Irrfan Khan is what happens when you take away the aspirational value away from Bollywood's romantic heroes. He is the antithesis of Shah Rukh Khan; his romantic hero is over the age of 30, isn't traditionally charming, doesn't go “palat”, and absolutely can't guarantee love at first sight.

Yet, he's the kind of unsuitable romantic hero who's the need of the hour in an industry with a rigid idea of a romantic hero, and a genre that is dominated entirely by an SRK who is glaringly off his game right now.

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Over the years, typical romantic heroism necessitated an ageless chiseled body, multiple Euro trips, breaking into song and dance after every fifteen minutes, and a dialogue delivery that is laced with glycerin tears. Its victory rested on its ability to evoke larger than life experiences, and by how detached it was from the mundane daily life. Think SRK in 'Dil Toh Pagal hai', or in 'Kuch Kuch Hota Hai'. His brand of romance and the characters he portrayed (Rahul, most of the times) were designed to be sold as “the chosen one” and it was this exclusivity that kept away other brands of romantic heroism, cementing SRK's place in our hearts for eternity.

Because for a long time, SRK was the only romantic hero we had.

Let's face it, most women have wanted to find the one, and have him yell “Palat... Palat” at them to test their connection. They've all wanted him to stretch his hands in the middle of a mustard field and ask them to come running to him for a hug.

But there comes a time when the dreamy Rahuls and Rajs don't cut it anymore. A time when it dawns on you that the romance in real life doesn't work the way it works in the universe of Yash Raj Films. What else can explain the collective rejection of SRK's romantic hero act with Kajol in 'Dilwale'? Times have changed, bringing about a wave of self-awareness that made us realise the frivolity of Bollywood romances.

What we yearned for instead, was a depiction of how love is in real life, on the big screen. And, in came Irrfan Khan, the knight in shining armour.

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The year we stood witness to SRK and Kajol's reunion in 'Dilwale', we also had the pleasure of meeting Irrfan's Rana Chaudhary in Shoojit Sircar's brilliant 'Piku'. The owner of a cab company, Rana provided perfect foil to Deepika's 'Piku'. Rana was everything the Rahul of yesterday didn't want to be; he was mature, understated, and extremely straightforward about his feelings. Rana may have had a deadpan tough exterior, but he had an inherent niceness to him; one that he reserved for special occasions.

On one hand, Rana was unafraid to call out Bhaskar's idiosyncrasies, or point out his emotional blackmailing tactics directed at Piku, and on the other, he would let his gestures and silences speak for his growing fondness toward Piku. Rana wasn't one to make things glaringly obvious. Instead, he took his time. Piku warmed up to Rana the same way the audiences have warmed up to Irrfan Khan's subtle romance.

There's a beautiful scene where Rana just gives Piku a look after Bhaskar sits in the front seat next to him, implying that a seat change is necessary. Piku understands what he's trying to convey, and promptly exchanges seats with her father. No words are spoken, yet this scene is the most satisfying part of the film, setting the tone for the rest of it. What makes Rana even more delightful is how he doesn't even attempt to woo Piku, simply because real life doesn't work that way. With him, Piku wouldn't have gotten a life of grand gestures, but instead a partnership where she was understood. Rana, then became the kind of romantic lead, who wasn't ideal, or aspirational; but one who was flawed, ordinary, and painfully real. He wasn't perfect and yet didn't feel the need to change in order to impress, because real life didn't work that way.

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It took Irrfan Khan two years to essay another romantic lead, but when he did play one in 'Hindi Medium', he knocked it out of the park. Besides giving lessons in millennial parenting, his Raj Batra was an unconventional romantic lead. He had absolutely zero charisma, was loud, cried over leaving Chandni Chowk for South Delhi, and refused to put on a performance for the sake of the sophisticated society. But, more importantly, he was also a portrait in companionship, a trait so rare in the romantic heroes we've grown up with. He loved his wife and daughter unconditionally, and showed it in the smallest and quirkiest of ways. For Raj Batra believed in the little things.

But, it is this month with his 40-year-old Yogi in Tanuja Chandra's 'Qarib Qarib Singlle' that Irrfan's quiet redefining of the romantic hero has come full-circle. Yogi is the stark opposite of Rana, and a reminder of what Raj Batra could have ended up being had he not found his sweetheart in his teenage years. Yogi is a marathon enthusiast who runs at Carter road as training, takes an oath to give it back to the creeps populating a dating app the girl he's met for the first time has had to encounter. His thoughtful words betray his flashy exterior; comprising of a tomato-red joggers and caps that scream YOLO. Fittingly so, for Yogi is a human manifestation of YOLO.

He's a nightmare to be with; he keeps talking about his exes and is confused about his feelings for them, never knows what to say and snores away every night mid-conversation. But, even Yogi's flaws become endearing once it dawns on you everything that he has to offer. Despite venturing on a trip with a girl he's just met, Yogi doesn't have the confidence to put his hazy feelings into words. It's just meant to be understood: through his focused stares, and a last-minute jump inside a cable car.

There's no one better than Irrfan to play a character like Yogi. There's a certain sarcasm, hilarity, and flawless satisfaction that only a gifted actor, with a career spanning 29 years in Bollywood can bring out. The most surprising bit about Yogi that Irrfan effortlessly breathes life into is the complete lack of frills in his persona.

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We know men like Yogi, Raj Batra, and Rana Chaudhary in real life simply because Irrfan Khan makes it possible for us to relate to them. In giving a voice and a face to the very man flawed men, his brand of romantic heroism comprises a sacrosanct message: It's possible to find the extraordinary in ordinary.

The men women fall in love with in real life aren't going to be perfect. They'll irritate, have their fair sets of flaws, and will often make one reach a point where they have to rethink the decision of being with them, but if Irrfan Khan's portrayal of them is any indication, their inadequacies doesn't mean they can't be the romantic heroes in regular lives.

Of the many reasons it's necessary that we herald Irrfan Khan's brand of realistic romantic hero as the most significant one is the fact that he doesn't end up giving us unrealistic expectations of romance, despite giving us the romance of a lifetime.

I can't think of a bigger triumph than that.