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Les Misérables and The Hunchback of Notre-Dame (French: Notre-Dame de Paris) will tell you how no one can touch Victor Hugo when it comes to the 'Romantic Movement'. Apart from being one of the greatest and best-known French writers of all time, Victor Hugo remains an iconic figure in world literature, thanks to his unique take on the social and political issues pertaining to the times.
However, one area of his life that deserves to be under the spotlight, in hindsight, is his *** life that apparently was borderline insane. Victor Hugo's *** life is touted as one that was 'too crazy to be real' because of his voracious carnal appetite.
Here are 7 facts about Victor Hugo's *** life that are bound to make any man feel, umm, 'not adequate'.
1. He had *** with more than 200 women in a period of less than two years.
2. He claimed that he had *** nine times on his wedding night, with his wife Adele.
Victor Hugo (1802-85) had an enormous sexual appetite. He claimed that on their wedding night he and his wife Adèle Foucher had *** nine times. After five pregnancies in eight years, his wife called a halt to any more ***. So Hugo turned to the brothels of Paris.
(Thread) pic.twitter.com/9YtOZJNgWT
3. He had seduced his son's lover by writing erotic letters to her, and took her to bed.
4. There are 83 instances of love-making recorded in his diary, during a period of 4 months, just before he died at the age of 83.
In the four months before he died at the age of 83, his diaries record 83 separate bouts of love making.
— Whores of Yore (@WhoresofYore) September 5, 2019
5. Records state that Hugo's *** drive was so high that he would have *** multiple times in a day with multiple partners - he could have *** with a young prostitute in the early morning, with some actress before lunch and a famous courtesan in the evening.
6. When he died, all the brothels in Paris were shut, as every single prostitute in the city was mourning the loss of a loyal client.
His diaries reveal he would have several partners a day. When Hugo died the brothels of Paris closed down for a day of mourning, allowing all the city’s *** workers to pay their last respects to a loyal client.
— Whores of Yore (@WhoresofYore) September 5, 2019
7. As per more detailed reports, apparently all the *** workers had draped their genitals with black crepe post his demise as a mark of respect.
Literary critic Edmond de Goncourt claimed a police officer told him that *** workers even draped their genitals in black crepe as a mark of respect.
— Whores of Yore (@WhoresofYore) September 5, 2019
Here are a few tweets that perfectly explain what we feel about this information.
Smells Like Victor-y
— Jay Exner (@starbucksrogers) October 17, 2020— wash your hands (@Alina_YYZ) October 17, 2020He wasn't Miserables then. (I'll get my coat)
— Lea (@LeaAStone) October 17, 2020If he's ejaculating that much, I'm mainly surprised that his body was able to make enough sperm to knock his wife up that much. His poor testicles were working pretty much beyond ivertime
— Andrea Petersen (@Neondancer) September 10, 2019I guess he just liked having ***. That's not addiction, that's personal preference, like some people play golf whenever they can.
He could afford prostitutes, so he did.
Always heartening to read of successful people who lived a life of utter fulfillment, rather than suffering some sad demise... makes you wonder what else he no doubt penned, that went unpublished, inspired by his carnal exploits.
— Midsummerman (@Midsummerman1) September 6, 2019Like someone said, it looks like he wasn't 'miserable'. Oof.
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